
Matthew 5:38-48
You may be familiar with the Golden Rule in Matthew 7:12 but did you know it was J.C. Penney who decided to name his department store, the ‘Golden Rule Store’ in 1902 to reflect his commitment to this value. It lasted till 1913 until he became the rule or just maybe the ‘Golden Rule’ is just bad for business.
Well, there are a few rules that have come more to the surface based on their nature more than their name. The first one that gets ripped apart in this teaching is what some have referred to as the ‘reciprocal rule’ which basically means whatever you do for me, I’ll do for you. It is certainly not a bad rule, but certainly one that fits well with personal loyalties.
There is also the ‘richochet rule’ which basically is like a ‘pay it forward’ idea where I do to someone based on what someone else has done to me. It allows me to understand my deficiencies and my good qualities based on my past experiences and the people who have shaped me. It allows me to really just be the product of my environment.
Finally we have ‘hidden motive’ rule. Most mothers can sniff this one out with their kids from a mile away. They just keep lavishing all this attention, interest, commitment to detail…all the while you know you are being set up for the ‘big ask’!
Nevertheless Jesus was always bending the rules and stretching us way beyond our comfort zone with his radical statements that become life changing for those who dare to live by them. Today we will focus on why love was always personal, vulnerable and sacrificial in His eyes.
In Jesus' day Israel was pretty much subdued by the Roman presence. The Jews had had a long history of being the people of God, but now they found themselves oppressed and so their culture had become very much about preserving and protection. It was very much an Us VS Them mentaltity. Being a light to the nations was the furthest thing from their mind and really they had ever reason to be bitter and walk around with a chip on their shoulder. It was justified and now Jesus keeps challenging them to get involved, reach out and trust God for all that security and significance stuff and just love people well. It was a tough, hard pill to swallow.
We need to recognize also that Jesus’ focus is on interpersonal relationships. He is not intending for this to be delivered to the court system or for the government for that matter. Later in Matthew 18 Jesus is very clear about confronting one another and discipline. This is not about pacifism or cheap grace churches.
Now we do the hard work of figuring just how are we going to apply all of this to life in the 21st century. If I gave you five minutes, I’m sure you could give me good examples where taking Jesus’ words literally here could be very detrimental. I just have to mention telemarketers at supper time or you grandmother who gives to a television preacher so that he can build some multi million dollar campus and she literally starves herself…
The focus is on our need to step in to a situation in our day to day interactions and how we need to live with generosity, forgiveness and love. It is relearning that first instinctive response when we are short changed. Jesus is working overtime to teach his followers a very radical love. It is a love that gets really personal, very vulnerable and humanly speaking, impossible.
Jesus taught us love is really PERSONAL v38-42
Eye for eye and tooth for tooth was rooted in OT teaching. It had a great way of slowing down vigilantes and satisfied the demands for revenge. Now, Jesus turns the tables and tells them how it is to go now and He uses some extreme examples:
• being slapped in the face - For most of us in our culture, it won’t be a literal ‘slap in the face’ but for us it can be easily done through back talk, being misrepresented or being completely overlooked, forgotten, disrespected, insulted.
• being taken advantage of financially and materially with our possessions and to the limits of our human strength and endurance. Have you ever felt used by someone? The only time that they call is when they need you for something? The coat represented one’s security. The coat not only protected them against the elements but it often was also used as their blanket at night. Jesus is telling us not to worry about giving those things up that make us feel secure.
As parents that is what we try to do for our kids, we want to provide them with security and create a safe place. However, as they grow older we have less and less control over that and as they become more independent what do we do? We become more and more dependent on God for their very lives and future. Jesus is telling us God is your best protection and the sooner we learn that the better. We have to hold it all with open hands before him.
• Being pushed to the limit of our human strength - This is a reference to the law of the land of that day, which allowed the Roman occupying forces to compel the Jews as citizens of one of their territories to carry their pack of gear for them up to a distance of one mile. It served as a constant reminder that they were oppressed and living under a foreign dictator.
I don’t know about you but this makes me feel very uncomfortable because it is very easy to speak about and so hard to really live out.
Jesus' point is not that we should let people physically abuse us, but that we should refrain from trying to get even when someone insults us. Now we are told to entrust that all to God and let Him work on that person. Let’s face it, He will get it right every time.
Jesus isn't telling us to be weak and passive; what He is telling you is not to be vindictive.
The longer you hold on to the idea of retaliation, the more the insult hurts.
None of us should be walking around like we have to settle a score, prove our point, demand our way. It is so counter culture that when we actually do it others will notice. I think there are just some people who just believe they have every reason to have a chip on the shoulder and make you know it.
The question Jesus is asking us is ‘what type of people do we want to be?’ Are we going to always be the ones who make sure we get everything that is owed to us, always watching our bottom line?
Jesus is trying to mold the kind of followers who have as the "default setting" of their hearts to be shalom, the peace and presence of God for ourselves and for those around us. It is godliness with contentment that is amazing gain. Of course, shalom in the community gets wrecked when injustice is rampant and that's why Jesus' words here should not be taken to mean that we willingly tolerate con artists or that we always give in to telemarketers.
It really means to get to the place where I understand that I live with open hands. I hold everything that I have – my identity, my reputation, my possessions, my abilities and tell God I want to be a great steward of all this.
Jesus taught us that love is very VULNERABLE v43 -47
He is referring to Leviticus 19:18 and once again that verse had been misquoted on the whole ‘hate your enemy’ was added on in the place of ‘as yourself’ and secondly, the word ‘neighbor’ had been as narrowly defined as possible.
Paul expands on this in Romans 12:19,20
It is a love that is proactive rather than reactive.
It comes down to our attitude…life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react or respond to it. There is one thing that is more important than the decision of my education, vocation, where I choose to live, the person that we choose to marry and it is the one string that we can play and that is our attitude.
I love the story by Max Lucado, You Are Special, and how Eli the woodcarver helps Punchinello understand how special he is--no matter what other Wemmicks may think and no matter what they say. Eventually he really does believe and those grey dots that the others give him begin to drop off. WHY…because he starts caring more about what God thinks about Him and less and less about what others do.
The fact does remain that while the person who mistreated you may not change, it will change you by the way you respond.
The story that sticks out most to me here is the story of Corrie Ten Boom when she came face to face with the German soldier who sent her sister to the gas chamber.
Jesus taught us that love is, humanly speaking, IMPOSSIBLE v48
Anyone perfect here?...Perfect as God?
It is that kind of love that values relationships way more than it does possessions. It is that decision to surprise others when they least deserve it or expect it
Some might say, but wait, isn’t this just enabling this sort of behaviour in some bad codependent sort of way? The truth is really the opposite as Christ is asking us to choose to act in love even if they treat me as an enemy. It goes against every natural fiber of our being and that is why it is so radical.
So can we truly know and experience the ‘golden rule’? The Message puts it this way, “Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them” Matthew 7:12 in The Message
The word "perfect" means complete, finished, or mature. Jesus is telling us to, "Be all that you were redeemed to be. Just as God lives out his actions in a way that is consistent with his character, you should live in a way that is consistent with what you were redeemed to be." Become what you are becoming and you will start surprising yourself and others! We are created in the image of God and we are being transformed completely into the image of Christ. We have the incredible opportunity to display the wonder of who Jesus is.
So what is our desire? It is to allow Jesus to shine more and more through our lives, to be more and more conformed to his image so that people are pointed through our lives to the Savior, the one who has rescued us and longs to rescue them.
So, you make the decision to say yes to radical love and what happens?
Well, you sleep most of the afternoon off, go to Downpour, have a great day at work. You get home exactly at 5:15pm because the 401 parted for you like the Red Sea. Everyone rushes to meet you at the front door and everyone pitches in to make dinner. It’s pasta night so the kids and you make homemade pasta and you just happened to pick up fresh bread at La Rose. During the meal, the conversation is scintillating and everyone opens up and shares their deepest feelings. Everyone pitches to clean up and it only takes 2.5 minutes..amazing. When the kids finish their homework (with no help from you required) you go load up those family pictures on Facebook and check in on some friends. You then pull out a family game and then surprise, there is a knock on the door and its Cogeco. It turns out they heard about your family and want to do a special on yes, your family…just how do you do that. You laugh, you cry, you put the kids to bed, have a wonderful romantic evening and you and your spouse make passionate love for the tenth night is a row!!
OK, so here’s the real reality more likely. You get home after 6 because you have been fighting two hours of traffic, you grab a cold piece of pizza, you try to make sense of your kids algebra – a subject you last understood in 1984 – you vaguely remember these small people in your home that you put to sleep. You then channel surf and some how end up on TLC for Jon and Kate + 8. You think their amazing and then after that you fall asleep on the couch watching the Dugger family have their 25th child. You wake up and somehow TSN is on and its almost midnight…
It is a love that is self sacrificing, but please don’t get paralyzed by the ideal. Just start living in real time, believe in who God has made you to be.
Do you want to hear real time stories from this week?
Real love is staying home on your BDAY with your sisters who are vomiting so your parents can lead their Bible study and ministry that night.
Real love is making the decision that you are going to commit your life to serving single moms and orphans in Romania.
It is learning to say God loves you to someone in your family who is dying of cancer and is really angry with God.
It is loving God even though you lost your job and you don’t know how you are going to pay next month’s rent.
Real love is about learning to release your child into hands of God when they don’t want to listen to you anymore.
Is there anyone who can testify to a really personal or very vulnerable or maybe humanly impossible kind of love this week.
The Takeaway
To love as Jesus loved is impossible but to let His love flow through me is possible only by the grace of God and the power of the Holy Spirit.
Questions For Discussion
1. What does Jesus’ Golden Rule say to what about what you could do for someone in a relationship this week?
2. What is one very practical thing that you can do to develop a habit of treating others as you would want them to treat you?
3. What is our real enemy in all of this counsel?
3. Has some idealized image kept me from really living out the life God has for me in my life and relationships?